To Every Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Alone
To Every Girl Who Is Afraid To Be Alone,
**Learn. There are a hundred different ways I could have started this but I fear you may not have the patience to read all of it. So I tell you what I want to tell you in the first line. **
Learn. Learn to be alone.
Perhaps you were born to a father who kissed your forehead the day you were born and swore to protect you for the rest of your life.
Perhaps they called you “princess” at home and made you believe that it was necessary to belong somewhere to feel beautiful and loved.
Maybe you had best friends growing up. Girlfriends who would fiercely protect you and boys who made you laugh hard.
Or maybe, you were never single. You always had ‘love’ string along . Someone to talk to. Someone to cry to. Someone to lean on. Someone to dress up for. Someone to love. Someone to touch. Someone to make you feel wanted. Someone to call you beautiful.
I am guessing you had all of this. Or some of this. Or none of this. It doesn’t matter.
Learn. Learn to be alone.
Because learning that intimacy is pleasing to have but that it is not the end of the world is what will save you from this very world.
Learn to be alone because I don’t want you to feel like it’s the world against you when you realize that you have outgrown people.
Learn to be alone because one day you will come back home from work, tired and spent. And on that day when the familiar dinner table conversation of your family sounds like cacophony, I don’t want you to feel helpless.
Learn to be alone because sometimes people move far away from you. They move places, shift jobs and start new lives. Time-zones and careers and marriages cut across like a sharp piece of glass that test even the strongest relationships.
And sometimes even as you are cuddling with the love of your life, learn to be alone. Because sometimes. No, not sometimes.
People change all the time. For better or for worse.
And I don’t know why we say it like it is a bad thing.
Learn to be alone because seriously, you don’t want to be the girl with sad wallpapers and Instagram quotes on how to deal with emotional pain.
Learn to be alone even if you are picking out wedding clothes . Because I believe in forevers and rainbows but god forbid your relationship fades away. Sometimes quicker than the colour of your saree and sometimes long after you are too old to do anything about it.
Learn to be alone even if your relationship doesn’t fade away. Yes. Learn to be alone in a happy marriage. Learn to be alone even if you are a happy daughter. Learn to be alone when you hold your first born.
Learn to be alone when you move cities. Learn to be alone when you are in a crowded room with all the people who matter to you. Learn to be alone when you are by yourself.
Because learning to be alone is the first step to loving yourself. And it is the most important step to loving others.
Because learning to be alone means that the relationships in your life are not a necessity. They are not roots of a tree called selfishness and insecurity.
They are branches that give shade. They are flowers that add joy.
They are there. Or Not.
But you stand, tall and gorgeous anyway.
Loving them not because you need to. Not because you have to.
But because you want to.
And girl, don’t be afraid of being alone.Because not learning to be alone means that you might be lonely.
**And that my girl is something you should be very afraid of. **